I’ve never much cared for Valentine’s Day. Maybe it’s because I’ve never had a girlfriend on Valentine’s Day. Yeah, that’s probably it. Oh well. Let’s put that aside.
Typically I put out a short story or a piece of sketch comedy or something on Valentine’s Day, and I was aiming to do the same thing this year with my short story The Happy Seat but I’m really not satisfied with the draft I have of it yet. It will probably have to wait another week.
Just as well, I suppose, since if my sales for the day are any indication, the national day of love is not a great business day for those of us who pedal stories of dismemberment, disembowelment, and destruction — probably more Fourth of July type subject matter.
So here is a video I made last year with Cody Sims as part of my short-lived sketch-comedy group Roommates In Hell about a very enthusiastic Russian named Crazy Yevgeniy who runs a Valentine’s Day special on executions:
Still want more? Here’s a video from Jesse Thunderwake, my alter-ego through most of 2010, on a blind date with comedian Sheena Simmons:
Still want more? Here’s a video of Jesse explaining why he doesn’t like Valentine’s Day:
Anyway, that’s all I’ve got. Look for The Happy Seat next week, a short story about Valentine’s Day, young love, and executing the mentally handicapped.