Memoirs of a Rideshare Driver: At a Party for Accountants...
Episode 49 in a series of true rideshare stories
He’s in his thirties, well-dressed in an endearingly nerdy sort of way.
“I met a girl last week,” he tells me. “Today is kind of our first date.”
“Oh cool,” I tell him. “Where are you going?”
“It’s a Christmas party at her work, so it’ll probably be pretty quiet and laid back.”
“What kind of work does she do?”
“She’s an accountant,” he says. “It’s gonna be a whole party full of accountants, so if I’m not the funny one in that room, I’m doing something wrong.”
I sense a creative type. Maybe a fellow standup comic? A comedy writer, or actor? Even if it’s just for fun, someone who prides himself on being the funny one in a room could be a kindred spirit.
“What do you do?” I ask him.
“I’m a financial advisor.”
There is a long pause. From his comment about accountants, I would have expected something drastically different. Financial advisement and accounting are practically the same job. Most jokes you would make about an accountant you could just as easily make about a financial advisor. I half-expect that he is loading up a joke right now, but he doesn’t come out with one. Eventually, I try to do it for him.
“Is that a bit like, ‘In the land of the blind, the man with one eye is king’?”
He shrugs, not sure what I’m getting at.
“At a party for accountants, the financial advisor is the funny one?”
He doesn’t laugh, doesn’t even seem to understand that I’m making a joke.
“Well, I hope so,” he says sincerely.
Jesus. If this guy’s the funny one, accountants must be boring as shit.
Memoirs of a Rideshare Driver is a series that tells true stories of my 10,000+ trips as a rideshare driver. I will post them every Monday in 2025.